- How old am I:
- I am 35
These apps usually have appeal for as long as a regular social media news cycle and not much beyond that.
What we all can learn from the poop girl and her poop-filled dating romance. This article is for everyone else: Those who would sooner die than let it be known by a love interest that they need to drop a load. This article is for the poop on that Tinder date in Bristol who, after she pooped and clogged up the toilet, panicked, plucked the log out of the toilet, wrapped it in toilet paper and chucked it out the window.
Unfortunately, said log actually just went into a gap poop two windows and got stuck, where it would ostensibly live and smell forever i. So she confessed to her date, then tried to rescue the poop by crawling in between the two windows. Ultimately, she got stuck, firefighters were called her, the window was damaged and she made internet history as the most sympathetic person on earth.
In fact, we can all learn from the cautionary tale that is her poop story. Pretend you forgot something in your car.
Pretend you need a personal item from a nearby drugstore. Pretend you need to step outside and take a call, even, but hoof it to the nearest public bathroom and get the situation handled.
Getting caught pooping outside in public is crazier than tossing your poop out the window. Flush first and make sure the toilet is working. Also, aim well. And when flinging poop, always do so with the ultimate stealth.
You can do this by first turning off the poop to the toilet a knob behind the bowlsquirting a healthy amount of shampoo in the bowl and using hot water from the tap to fill it up so the poo breaks down and forces through. Unfortunately, you need a gallon of water and 15 minutes for this strategy.
Related internet links
Similarly, other people claim you can just use the toilet brush wrapped in plastic. Finally, you could use a wire hanger, unraveledas a makeshift auger to try to force it all down.
And that sucks. So laugh about it and deal with it.
Tracy Moore is a staff writer at MEL. Formerly at Jezebel. How to Poop on a First Date What we all can learn from the poop girl and her poop-filled whirlwind romance. This is an immutable fact.
Just Poop Flush first and make sure the toilet is working. More Stories from MEL.